A motorcycle accident resulting in the loss of the ability to drive stick is the motivation for the sale of today’s Forester, with the present owner claiming “My loss, your gain.” Let’s see if its price leaves us at a loss.

Some people like to drink orange juice without the pulp. It saves having to root around for errant bits of orange with your tongue after a glass when all you really wanted was just to get hydrated and enjoy a little Vitamin C. Others, on the other hand, like their OJ pulpy, thinking that the added texture makes the experience closer to the bliss of eating a fresh orange right off the tree.

Considering that context, I think we can all agree that the we looked at yesterday is the automotive equivalent of pulp-free orange juice. In another way of looking at it, it’s the middle-aged dude with an undisclosed vasectomy called upon to repopulate a post-apocalyptic world. You know what I mean, kind of a disappointment. At $15,000, the Buick’s price proved an even bigger disappointment for most of you, ending up in a massive 97 percent No Dice loss. Maybe the outcome would have been slightly less tragic had the seller managed to clean the cat footprints off the car before doing the ad’s photos?

The main shot in the ad for today’s is pretty impressive, with the car seemingly having just scaled a rugged mountain crest and with nary a cat in sight. According to the seller, this Subie was built for just such offroading shenanigans. Unfortunately, those have been curtailed as the seller explains, “Had an motorcycle accident and can’t drive a manual anymore.”

That’s too bad since there seems to have been a ton of work put into this Forester for just such adventuring, and manual transmission examples of the breed are sort of few and far between. One of the biggest of those updates made to the Forester is the installation of a 63K EJ207 taken from a JDM importer. That likely more than makes up for the chassis’ 188,500 miles.

Other updates include KYB struts, RalliTek springs that give the car a one-inch lift, and a scrape-plate under the engine for going over the rough stuff. An additional ADF lift kit helps to give the car a full 12 inches of ground clearance.

The turbocharged and intercooled pancake four is claims to run smooth and not burn any oil. It’s backed up by a heavy-duty clutch to keep things in check. Along with all that, the car comes with two full sets of wheels/tires, with the second set including BFG mud-slingers.

Aesthetically, the car looks decent in the pics, although the seller does admit to it having a number of brush-related scratches in the paint and a small dent in a fender from an interaction with a tree. On the functional side, the seller notes a small leak on the transmission tail shaft, another minor leak from the left side of the engine, and a crack in the sunroof that, contrastingly, is said to not leak.

We don’t get to see much of the interior, but the glimpse we do get indicates that the car has leather upholstery and a JVC double DIN aftermarket stereo in the center stack. That apparently also functions as the screen for an added-on backup camera.

The seller says they have the clean title in hand and is willing to take cryptocurrency in exchange for the car’s $8,500 asking. That’s not something any of us need to worry about since our currency is all hypothetical, not crypto,and hence zero risk. Isn’t that nice?

Let’s see how nice this off-roading Subaru feels at that $8,500 asking, hypothetical or not. What do you think, does this build seem to be worth that kind of money? Or, is this a Forester that’s priced to be left out in the woods?

You decide!

Portland, Oregon, , or go if the ad disappears.

H/T to Don R. for the hookup!

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