Today’s e Country Squire is a throwback to an era when wagons dominated suburbia. Let’s see if this gargantuan faux wood-paneled longroof has a price that will dominate our vote.

Hey, can you think of any time when someone was turned down in an attempt to join a cult? I mean, I can’t imagine that Scientology has ever told an applicant that “It’s just not going to work out,” explaining, “It’s not you, it’s me.”

The we looked at yesterday is a model of car with a very well-established cult-like following. At $40,000, however, that particular membership had a pretty steep initiation fee. That was something the vast majority of you felt only worthy of a true cultist, earning the Doka a 78 percent No Dice loss from us normies.

Speaking of normal, it once was totally commonplace to see massive wagons plying the streets of suburbia all across the American landscape. Whether it was carrying the little league team to post-game pizza, picking up potting soil at the home center, or just heading out for a weekend away, the full-sized wagon proved versatile enough to do it all.

And why wouldn’t it? With up to 10-passenger capacity, flexible seating/storage options, and available woodgrain appliqué down their flanks, big wagons from the three major American manufacturers had pretty much everything you needed. That is until the gas crisis and ever-encroaching emissions standards made obvious a couple of the big wagons’ downsides, those being fuel economy and power-sapping weight.

These days, the big wagons of yore are a rare sight on the road or in suburban driveways. This is here to keep the flame alive and, perhaps, provide a taste of what once was to those too young to have ever taken a lap of luxury in such a magnificent beast.

The seller calls this Light Jade Glow Metallic Country Squire their “big country girl.” And big it is. This is the longest and heaviest station wagon Ford has ever produced. Of course, its modern-day equivalent, the Expedition MAX is almost as long, with an even longer wheelbase but shorter overhangs. It’s totally not the same, however.

There’s something wonderful about riding in the back-back of one of these older wagons, whether it’s in a rear-facing bench or, as in this car’s case, the flip-up side seats. Behind that is a Magic Doorgate tailgate that both swings and folds as the mood hits.

The ad notes V8 power, but doesn’t provide the displacement. The base engine this model year was a 351 Cleveland V8 which could muster 145 horsepower and 273 lb-ft of torque. Above that sat a 160-horse 400 CID V8 and a 202-horse 460. By all appearances, however, this car has the 351C. That has seen some work, including new belts and hoses, gaskets, and a radiator. In fact, the whole heating system, including the cabin core is said to have been replaced.

Other work includes new brakes and shocks, a transmission flush, and some electrical work. Still on the docket are an A/C leak (R12, yikes!), new duct tape for the plastic engine air intake, and the repair of some creeping rust on the big back bumper. More importantly, though, both the engine and three-speed automatic (with column shift!) are said to be ready to rock.

Aesthetically, save for that bumper, it all looks to be in pretty good condition. There are only 56,500 miles showing on the odometer, but that could be more seeing as it doesn’t have enough barrels to show over 99K. The paint and vinyl wood siding all look to be in serviceable shape if somewhat tired shape, as does the equally vinyl-clad interior, which has some tears in the driver’s side cushion.

The American Racing mags give the car a subtle bit of rebel style, but other than that, the look is pure big-ass Ford, with that company’s penchant for filigree and covered headlamps evident in the design. The title is clean and the car comes with a ton of parts receipts and original service manuals. All that comes in at an asking price of $9,500.

Now, if you wanted to parse that out on a price per weight basis then that works out to less than $2 per pound. Heck, looking at it that way, it’s a killer bargain. Of course, we don’t play like that. We look at the car, its place in the automotive ecosystem (history, significance, versatility, etc.), and the condition to make our decisions. That’s just how we roll, and it’s now time for you to roll into voting on this Country Squire’s fate.

What do you say, is this biggest of the big worth that $9,500 asking as it’s presented in the ad? Or, for that much should this “big country girl” be put out to pasture?

You decide!

San Francisco Bay Area, California, , or go if the ad disappears.

H/T to Don R. for the hookup!

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