Say you joined the so-called —named such for the tow company that hauls your busted car away if you eat it on the Nürburgring in spectacular fashion—and you’re rushed to the hospital in nearby Adenau, Germany. Good news! There’s a track map on the ceiling (complete with corner names) just in case you need it.

“Show us on the map where you screwed up,” some doctor who’s probably seen it all at the St. Josef Hospital in Adenau will say.

If you can’t look up (ouch), good news! There’s another map on the door into the room as well. I’m sure by now they’ll know what you mean when you grunt at any given area by now given that the track runs right through the town of Adenau itself.

Fortunately, in our case, it was just a mishap with a chunk of prosciutto and a large knife that landed a member of our party in the emergency room. He was okay after some timely stitch work, and more importantly, no cars were harmed, either. The prosciutto, however, was a total loss.

As someone who in spectacular fashion on track before, I find this all mildly amusing. This would have been a huge help when I finally woundup at my doctor’s office, especially if the local docs knew the horrors (and likely speeds) of which I spoke!

However, I also hope you never end up needing to visit this ER room at St. Josef, regardless of whether your screw-up was on track or off. Be careful out there!